Selective Search Review (Best Chicago Millionaire Matchmaker For You?)

What do you get when you cross Cupid with a corporate headhunter? Barbie Adler’s Selective Search^® dating service.

A former executive recruiter, Barbie Adler says she applies her Fortune 500 executive recruiting strategies to the Selective Search matchmaking process.

But rehoming a CEO is one thing - finding your soulmate is quite another. So can Adler’s approach get results for you?

From the smallest boutiques to the industry's biggest players, we've reviewed over 200 matchmaking services. Our insight comes from 14+ years of matchmaking experience, comprehensive research, real client reviews, and a deep understanding of the matchmaking landscape.

These Selective Search reviews have everything you need to know to decide if what works in the business world will work in your love life.

Let's dive in!

Getting Started With Selective Search

Founded by Barbie Adler in 2000, Selective Search is a Chicago-based nationwide matchmaking service. 70% of paying clients are male, and the company only works with 500 clients around the country at any given time.

Although they are headquartered in Chicago, there are affiliated matchmakers in 20+ cities all over the country. Selective Search locations include, but are not limited to: Austin, Boston, Dallas, Houston, Los Angeles, Miami, New York, San Diego, San Francisco, Tampa, and Washington DC. 

Most of the 250,000+ singles in their database are located in North America, with a handful of international ones in cities like Hong Kong and Sydney.

How To Join Selective Search

Become a client.

Signing up as a client with Selective Search involves what Adler refers to as the “Meet Your Future Process.” It begins with a 2-hour interview and also includes answering around 15 pages of questions.

During the interview, the prospective client’s relationship goals and ideal partner criteria are identified and compiled into a document called “The Benchmarks.” Matchmakers then search their database of eligible singles, or “candidates,” for a suitable match.

Become a candidate.

Candidates don't pay to be listed in the database. But they must pass the same 2-hour screening process the clients undergo.

There is no guarantee of candidates ever being considered for matching with paying clients. So you may create a profile for the database but never actually meet anyone.

Selective Search conducts background and social media checks on every candidate, and they are recruited primarily through Selective Search’s extensive advertising.

This luxury matchmaking firm frequently purchases ad space in Ivy League alumni publications, Fortune, Forbes, and inflight magazines. Candidates are also recruited at various events and online, and can sign up via their website.

Selective Search doesn’t offer a money-back guarantee. But they do promise they will thoroughly screen each introduction. In other words, you’ll only be presented with matches who meet the full criteria identified in the Benchmark document.

How Selective Search Cost Compares With Other Services

Let’s take a look at how Selective Search prices stack up to other matchmaking services with a national reach. 

Enamour ($20,000+)

Enamour, an elite matchmaking service with a global reach, employs a unique blend of human intuition, AI, and data science to identify highly compatible matches. Six-month packages start around $20,000, which includes matches pulled from the ultra-exclusive, invite-only database. Enamour packages also included extensive scouting outside the database. 

VIDA Select ($1,795 - $2,595/month)

VIDA Select is a modern matchmaking service with an international presence. Unlike most other services, VIDA Select offers packages paid on a monthly basis - no long-term contracts!

Thanks to a tech-driven proprietary process, VIDA's matchmakers leverage the largest pool of eligible singles there is. On average, clients begin a relationship with someone special after only 3 months of service.

Serious Matchmaking ($25,000+)

Serious Matchmaking, a NYC-based millionaire matchmaking service founded by Janis Spindel, starts at $25,000 and offers a selection of packages ranging up to $1,000,000. 

Serious Matchmaking works with clients worldwide, with pricing dependent on various factors such as the scope of your search and whether you work directly with Janis Spindel, her daughter Carly Spindel, or both.

Exclusive Matchmaking ($7,500+)

Exclusive Matchmaking, founded by Susan Trombetti and headquartered in Maryland, offers services in major cities around the US. Trombetti’s prices generally range from $7,500 to $50,000, but she also offers a $250,000+ package.

Millionaire’s Club ($45,000+)

Patti Stanger, the face behind Bravo’s hit reality show "Millionaire Matchmaker," also works with clients from around the world. The Millionaire's Club, located in Los Angeles, costs anywhere from $45,000 to $285,000+. The most expensive package includes working directly with Stanger.

Now that you have a quick cost comparison, let's take a look at...

How The Selective Search Matchmaking Process Unfolds

As a client, you’ll receive an unlimited number of “presentations.” Each one is a detailed description of a potential match.

Your presentations will be pulled from the candidate database of around 250,000 singles based on your ideal partner criteria. Selective Search also has a nationwide network of "Scouts" that recruit potential matches on your behalf.

The presentation includes a bio with information about her personality, plus any notes taken by the matchmaking team during her screening process. You’ll also get to see her photograph.

If you’re interested, Selective Search presents your information to the potential match. If the interest is mutual, phone numbers are exchanged.

You’re asked to call your match within 48 hours to set up the date. This automatically counts as one of your “introductions,” whether or not you in meet in person. It’s up to you to make contact with your match.

After your date, you can give your feedback on the quality of the match to your matchmaker so that any adjustments to the search process can be made.

Selective Search Reviews: What People Are Saying

Selective Search has a 4-star rating with Consumer Affairs, based on 20+ reviews. The reviews are a mix of 1 to 5 stars, and most are several years old. 

In a 1-star review from 2023, a former client shared what she described as a negative experience:

Selective Search responded via the platform, giving some context to the review:

This client initially gave the executive matchmaking service a one-star review after having 6 dates that went nowhere. But then he changed his mind and updated his rating to 5 stars:

This client is hopeful that she’ll meet her "forever man" through the service:

The Selective Search BBB rating is A+, and they are an accredited member. They have a 5/5 star rating based on 70+ reviews.

Clients like these two were happy with their matchmakers:

Selective Search has a 4.8-star rating on Google, based on 30+ reviews. Many were from women who were happy with the men they received as matches. For example:

However, two reviewers presented Selective Search with a 1 star, and only one of them left a review. She had this to say about her experience:

On Yelp, Selective Search has garnered a 3-star rating.

Many of the positive Yelp Selective Search reviews appeared to be from women like these two who were satisfied with the quality of the matches they met:

There were also a handful of negative reviews, like this one from a client who didn't feel it was worth the expense:

The 200+ not currently recommended reviews are mostly positive, with a couple 1-star ratings as well.

Is Selective Search The Right Matchmaking Service For You?

Selective Search has received quite a bit of positive press. Adler is also considered a millionaire matchmaker, as her firm was named one of the 4 best matchmaking agencies for the ultra-wealthy in Fortune.

There is one difference between Selective Search and some of the other executive matchmaking services out there. It has to do with “hold” time.

Many companies allow you to pause your contract - some for up to 13 months - while you explore a promising relationship, take an international business assignment, travel, etc.

While Selective Search does offer a “defined hold period,” the amount of time needs to be negotiated into your contract up front.

The hold time cannot exceed the amount of time defined in your contract, and it needs to be used in 30-day increments. While that’s enough flexibility for some, others might not feel comfortable guessing how much hold time they might possibly need within the year-long contract.

That said, this elite dating service has a solid reputation as one of the best matchmaking companies out there.

You’ll find plenty of Selective Search success stories, and you could even be one of them.

But what if you could get the same high-quality service with even faster results - and without the high price tag?

Introducing: A More Modern Alternative At A Fraction Of The Cost

At VIDA Select, you’ll have a team of expert matchmakers working hard to find the woman of your dreams.

On average, it only takes 12 first dates for our clients to find that “spark” with someone. And it’s usually within the first 3 months!

VIDA's matchmakers access the most extensive database of high-quality singles in the world. So your search doesn't have to be limited to just a few locations or a list of “affiliated” women in your hometown.

Our expert matchmakers put you in control of the entire process, from deciding where to search for your ideal partner to how many dates you want to go on.

Whether it’s a handful of dates a week, or just one or two high quality introductions a month, our matchmakers make it happen.

With VIDA, you’re getting the same elite matchmaking service, but at a fraction of the Selective Search cost.

You won’t find any lengthy, expensive contracts here. You only commit to one month at a time, which means there’s no risk of paying for time you don’t actually need if you meet someone right away.

It all starts with a short, complimentary, casual phone call with one of our expert matchmakers. Get started now!

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