Meet Tammy Shaklee [Best Gay & Lesbian Matchmaker For You?]

Tammy Shaklee has been in the matchmaking industry for over a decade, and has carved out a name for herself as a go-to LGBTQ+ matchmaker. 

But you’re here, so you’re likely wondering if H4M Matchmaking is the right choice for you. 

Coming up, you’ll discover everything you want to know about matchmaker Tammy Shaklee, from her matchmaking philosophy to how she got started.

Our team of matchmaking experts has reviewed over 200 services, diving into their processes, success rates, costs, and customer experiences. We’ve been in the industry since 2009, so we know firsthand what clients value most in a matchmaker!

Meet Matchmaker Tammy Shaklee

Tammy Shaklee initially built her career around non-profits and consulting, bringing her expertise to development, marketing, and donor relations. 

Then the end of a meaningful relationship in her personal life ultimately brought about a career change. After spending two years as a single woman concentrating on her career, she realized how lonely she was personally.

She explained it this way to Huff Post: 

"I was 35, frustrated that I was still single two years after a long-term relationship had ended. My career was thriving and I loved life, but I worked too much and dating was difficult. Sundays were especially lonely. I thought, 'There has to be a professional to help me with this,' and there was."

Seeking a solution to her dating woes, Shaklee turned to a professional matchmaking service that eventually helped her meet Mr. Right. According to Shaklee, she was his third match and he was her 13th.

Since she had such a positive experience and outcome, Shaklee encouraged some of her gay friends to contact the service. 

However, she learned that not all matchmakers offer services for those within the LGBTQ+ community. In her own words, "It never occurred to me that certified matchmakers did not serve LGBTQ+ singles." 

In response to this gap in the industry, Shaklee conducted focus group interviews and research to see how she could support LGBTQ+ individuals in their pursuit of meaningful connections.

In 2012, she established H4M - “He’s For Me” - in Austin, Texas. 

Initially catering specifically to gay men, Shaklee’s commitment to inclusivity led H4M to expand its services to all members of the LGBTQ+ community.  

Shaklee believes that “each one of us deserves love, however, that looks and feels like to each individual."

While Shaklee didn't set out to become an Austin matchmaker, she shared in an interview that she has truly found her calling in life.

"I believe there are those of us with a servant’s heart and that our life’s work is to serve others. Those who need to give find those who have a need. That’s why I believe matchmaking was a calling for me. I had such a positive experience hiring a matchmaker and eventually meeting my husband.”

A Taste Of Tammy Shaklee’s Dating Advice 

Known for her expertise in dating and relationships within the LGBTQ+ community, matchmaker Tammy Shaklee has earned quite a reputation in the media. 

She’s frequently shared her dating advice in interviews and features on publications like The Washington Post, Bustle, Business Insider, The Oprah magazine, and more.

For instance, Shaklee specifically addressed the topic of "relationship deal breakers" with Best Life online.

She suggests that there might be certain personal hang-ups or biases preventing singles from discovering and committing to a relationship: 

Tammy Shaklee’s Matchmaking Philosophy

This Austin matchmaker’s approach to finding your ideal partner is hands-on and detail-oriented. Her philosophy revolves around getting to know clients on a deeper level so that she can match them accordingly.

Shaklee explains her approach this way:

"If I want to make a match, I don't send a photo and write a blurb of who one another is. I call my client and say 'I think I have a match for you' and we talk it out. It's very personal."

According to Shaklee, this personal approach is like a "human-interest story" unfolding. 

She delves into various aspects of her client's lives, from family dynamics to friendships, careers, and education to get a whole picture of who they are. She discusses any personal challenges they’ve experienced and how these experiences have influenced their character.  

“Your challenges make you who you are today, whether that be your career or past relationships. Any kind of experiences that you’ve learned lessons from. I’m interested in learning that about you before we even start talking about ‘What are you looking for?’ it’s more of ‘Who are you?’. I focus on the present and moving forward." 

Besides exploring the client’s past, Shaklee also guides them to create a more clear vision of the future. 

She emphasizes setting boundaries and planning steps to achieve future goals. This process, she believes, allows two individuals to concentrate their attention fully on each other when they are together.  

According to Shaklee, understanding a person's character, personality, and energy requires more than a single interaction. 

She suggests going on at least two dates before making any conclusive decisions about a potential partner.  As she shared with Instinct Magazine, 

“I have to coach my clients to get out of their own head and get to know the other person and vice versa. I take the worry out of my clients and let them have fun.”

Shaklee also advocates for self-prioritization in the quest for love. She urges singles to prioritize their health, well-being, and personal interests as they embark on a dating journey. 

Alongside nurturing an open mindset, she believes that this combination can lay the foundation for a fulfilling romantic connection.  

In her own words, 

"Having an open heart and mind in meeting others will lead to eventually meeting a compatible partner."

Becoming An H4M Client 

The process starts with an initial introductory call to discuss your dating history, lifestyle, personal goals, and desirable qualities in an ideal partner. 

Qualified candidates then move on to a 1-hour (or longer) interview with Shaklee via video or in person. If there's a mutual agreement to work together a background verification is cleared and then you're invited to come on board as a client.

Shaklee highlights how their approach prioritizes personal connections.  As she explained, 

"We get to know clients personally, and then represent them in setting them up with a compatible match. There is no need to complete a profile, or put a photo out there, as our introduction service does all of the work." 

The H4M team searches through other members and reaches out to their matchmaking network to identify suitable matches. Once a match is identified they’ll reach out to gauge your interest in meeting. 

It's important to note that no photographs are revealed beforehand, so you’ll be going on blind dates.

Details about the match are kept minimal—only the first name and industry of work are disclosed. As Shaklee puts it, 

"It's enough due diligence to make sure you don't already know each other, but it's not enough to look each other up."

You’re also given a sheet of talking points to guide conversation during the date. 

Want to learn even more about the H4M matchmaking service and how it works? 

For all the details about the process, cost, and what clients had to say about their experiences, check out our comprehensive H4M review next! 

All product and company names are trademarks™ or registered® trademarks of their respective holders. Use of them does not imply any affiliation with or endorsement by them.