Attractive women on Tinder don’t lack for choice, so they can uber selective when it comes to responding to conversation starters.
The good news is you matched with one. The bad news is lame icebreakers like “Hey” aren’t going to cut it, and neither is “How are you doing?”
That’s probably why you’re looking for Tinder first message examples, right?
You’re about to get 12 Tinder conversation starters that even the hottest local women won’t be able to resist. You’ll also get some expert tips on what makes each icebreaker effective, so you can try your hand at writing some of your own.
|Instant Bonus: Steal our 14 all-time BEST Tinder openers so ALL your matches instantly feel an uncontrollable urge to respond to you.|
Creativity Gets You Everywhere
… and boring gets you an empty inbox. Your opening message is her first impression of you, and if you don’t make a good one right out of the gate, she’s got zero incentive to believe things will improve if she decides to start a conversation with you by responding.
But when you ask her an imaginative question that’s actually fun to answer, the odds are much higher she’ll take the time to respond.
Here are 3 Tinder opening lines that will make her curious what else you have to say!
Tinder First Message Example #1:
Tinder First Message Example #2:
Tinder First Message Example #3:
See why those Tinder conversation topics will stand out in an inbox that looks something like this?:
On average, women in their 20s-30s log on to dating apps around 10 times a day, spending just under 8 minutes per session. If your first message doesn’t immediately command her attention, you’re most likely going to get lost in the shuffle with all the other lame pick-up lines she gets on the daily.
The Art Of The Compliment
Tinder First Message Example #4:
You’ve probably learned the hard way messages starting a conversation with “Hey baby, nice [fill in the blank]” don’t work very well. Attractive women generally know they’re attractive, and don’t need yet another guy pointing it out on Tinder.
Pairing a low-key compliment with an unexpected, funny question like in the example above is one way to go. Or if she has a photo of her dog or cat in her lineup, you can give your message a surprising twist by focusing on her pet’s good looks, rather than hers.
Tinder First Message Example #5:
Or simply let her know your interest runs deeper than just her physical appearance by inviting her to share a story or something else about herself with you.
Here are 3 great questions you can send as a first message on Tinder:
The human brain is wired in such a way that it literally feels good to talk about yourself, so put science to work for you on Tinder. When responding to your message makes her feel good, you’re that much closer to getting her number or a date.
GIFs Are Your Tinder Superpower
Few women are immune to the charms of an adorable puppy, and you can use that to your advantage on Tinder.
Simply pair a GIF of a puppy waving hello with your favorite Tinder icebreaker, and you’re golden:
With so many GIFs to choose from, it's easy to find one that ties in with your conversation starter. And here's the real advantage of using one – if Tinder's internal data is to be believed, she's 30% more likely to respond to your message when it includes an animated element.
Here are 3 dynamite pairings:
GIFs are also a great way to revive a conversation that stalled, or to send as a playful follow up if she didn’t respond to your first Tinder message.
Some GIFs instantly convey your meaning, no message required:
Or you can pair a funny “reminder” message like this one with a superhero GIF:
Messages that make her smile are ideal in these situations, as showing off your sense of humor is one of the best ways to spark a connection. Women are naturally attracted to guys they find funny, so making her laugh is a point in your favor.
If she doesn’t respond to your second message, it’s generally best to let it go. If you’re *really* into her, send a third – but sending any more than that is a bad idea, since it puts you firmly into desperation territory. Better to move on gracefully than force her to block you.
3 Common Mistakes That Will Sabotage Your Tinder Convo
#1: Not Keeping Up On The App
The last thing you want to do is send one of these great opening lines, then not check Tinder again for a few days. If you got a response, you've likely already shot yourself in the foot.
Some studies have found that 93% of women only swipe right on the profiles they're attracted to – and what better what to extinguish that spark than taking days to hold up your end of the conversation?
Considering you messaged her to begin with… that's not a great look, and it will be exponentially harder to climb out of the hole you just dug and convince her you're worthy of meeting in person.
That notion of not responding right away so you don't appear over eager are gone. These days, 89% of singles respond to a message on a dating app within 12 hours if they're interested – and that's a good rule of thumb to keep in mind.
If she's swiping on Tinder to find a relationship, showing that you're making yourself available and engaged in the process is a sure way to impress her.
#2: Not Asking A Question In Each Message
This is hands down the easiest way to keep a conversation going on Tinder, or any other dating app. Your questions provide the direction – all she needs to do is answer you.
When you don't ask a question, you could create the equivalent of that awkward pause when neither person knows what to say next. And the more she gets stuck on how to respond, the higher the risk that she won't.
It's good to have a couple of go-to questions mentally filed away that you can use in a pinch, because you won't find inspiration in every person's profile. If you need some ideas, check out these great questions to ask a girl you like on Tinder.
Asking fun, creative questions is essential – 83% of singles agree that having a great conversation on a dating app can lead to better real life conversations. First dates are stressful enough all ready, so anything you can do to boost your odds for success is worth the time, right?
#3: Not Paying Attention To Spell Check
Net speak and abbreviations are one thing, but outright misspellings and repeated grammar errors are an almost sure-fire way to turn her off. And if you make mistakes in your messages repeatedly, she may decide she's not that interested in continuing the conversation in person.
It only takes a few seconds to proofread what you've written before tapping send.
The Easiest Way To Conquer Tinder
A recent study found that writing great messages was the biggest source of stress when it comes to dating apps. These 12 Tinder first message examples are a great way to start the conversation- but to get the best possible results you need to figure out which of them work best for you.
A lot of factors are at play – your Tinder pictures and bio have a huge impact, but there’s also the age of your matches to take into consideration. A message that works for an early 20s college girl may induce an eye roll in a late 20s professional who’s looking for something more serious.
You can meticulously track each message you send and whether or not it worked, and adjust your strategy accordingly. This simple worksheet will help calculate your response rate.
Or you can skip past the time consuming part, and just go on dates with high-quality women instead. VIDA’s team of Tinder experts will do everything for you, from choosing your most attractive photos to writing an attention-getting bio.
Our professional writers will even handle all the messaging! We’ve been outsourcing Tinder for guys like you since 2009, so we know what works – and what doesn’t. Why waste all that time figuring it out for yourself, when you could be going on dates with attractive, intelligent women instead?
Click here to get started!