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Who’s The Best Gay Matchmaker? [ 7 Services To Consider!]

Hiring a matchmaking service that caters to LGBTQ+ individuals can be a great investment. When you connect with the right service, there's no better way to meet high-quality singles. But the question remains, which gay matchmaker should you turn to?

Our team of matchmaking experts has compiled this extensive guide to aid singles in determining which gay matchmaking service might best suit their needs.

With more than 200 reviews of matchmaking services under our belt, we know all the key players. And that’s to 14+ years of first-hand matchmaking experience, we have a keen understanding of what clients value in a service!

First up on our list of the top 7 gay matchmakers:

H4M (by Tammy Shaklee)

H4M gay matchmaker homepage

After trying to help a gay friend find a matchmaker, Tammy Shaklee realized there was a market niche that needed to be filled in Austin. She launched H4M in 2012, catering specifically to the LGBTQ+ community. 

H4M opened its doors with her friend as her first client. Shaklee's matchmaking philosophy is centered around treating every client equally, with inclusivity as the cornerstone of her process.

Although H4M is headquartered in Austin, Shaklee extends her services to singles across Texas and nationally. 


"H4M", an acronym for "He's For Me", initially helped men seeking men. Over time the company has broadened its scope to serve all LGBTQ+ singles seeking a range of relationships. 


While specific pricing isn’t publicly disclosed, Shaklee mentioned in an interview that packages “fall within the thousands, not the tens of thousands.” 

What To Expect 

Potential H4M clients start with an initial consultation. You'll also be required to pass a background check as part of the client vetting process.

Suggested matches come from H4M's existing clientele or candidates scouted on your behalf. All potential matches go through the same vetting process and background checks as clients.

Once a prospective match is identified, the team will reach out to you with a descripion to see if you're interested. Keep in mind you won't be shown any pictures prior to meeting up in person - it will be a blind date.

After each date, you're expected to provide feedback about how things went and if you'd like to pursue a second date. Shaklee and her team plan both the first and second dates for you. 

Further Reading

H4M reviews

Little Gay Book (by Dr. Frankie)

Little Gay Book matchmaking website homepage

Dr. Frankie Bashan, founder of Little Gay Book, has a professional background in clinical psychology. Throughout her time working with clients, she identified a notable absence of dedicated matchmaking services for lesbian, bisexual, and trans women seeking partners.

Convinced she could fill this void, Dr. Frankie established Little Gay Book in Oakland, California, in 2009. 


Little Gay Book works with lesbians, bisexuals, and trans women who are in search of a committed, long-term partner. Typically, her clients are 30+. 


The initial consultation costs between $500 and $750, depending on who does your interview.

Online matchmaking service reviews indicate that Little Gay Book matchmaking packages range from around $9,000 to $19,000+. 

The cost of dating and relationship coaching services varies, with pricing between $400 and $2,100 depending on the number of sessions purchased.

What To Expect 

The Little Gay Book process starts with a 90-minute call, during which you’ll talk about your dating history, compatibility factors, and more. Although the fee for the consultation is nonrefundable, it can be credited toward your matchmaking package if you sign up for services.

Completing this consultation means you're automatically listed as a 'prescreened catch' in Little Gay Book's singles database. This level of membership means you'll also be invited to private social events hosted in select cities.

A boutique matchmaker, Dr. Frankie only works with around 10 to 15 clients at a time. After completing the compatibility consultation, you are guaranteed a spot on the waiting list, becoming a matchmaking client as spaces open up.

Matchmaking packages typically range from 6 to 18 months. Within this period, clients are introduced to a predetermined number of matches, based on the duration of the contract. 

Further Reading

Little Gay Book review

Friend of a Friend (by Claire AH)

Friend of a Friend logo

Freelance writer Sofi Papamarko established Friend Of A Friend Matchmaking in 2013. She managed the business until 2020, at which point a former client, Claire AH, bought the service and took over. 


A Canadian matchmaking service, Friend Of A Friend Matchmaking extends its services to singles across the Greater Toronto Area. Promoting a culture of inclusivity, they offer matchmaking services to all ages, genders, and sexual preferences. The service has a matchmaker specializing in LGBTQ+ matchmaking.


The cost of matchmaking packages varies between $750 CDN to over $17,000 CDN. Stand-alone coaching sessions are around $100 CDN each.

Matchmaking contracts are typically for 1 year.

What To Expect 

Potential clients start with completing an online application. That will be reviewed by the team, and if they think you might be a good fit for services they’ll follow up. It takes approximately 10 days to get a response. 

If you pass the initial screening, you'll have a call with Claire AH to discuss working together. If you both agree, you’ll choose a matchmaking package and sign a contract. Next, you'll complete a detailed questionnaire which the team uses to generate your member profile.  

As a client, you're paired with other clients or members from their database. Opting for higher-tier matchmaking opens up the possibility of also being matched with singles recruited from dating apps and sites.

The primary focus of the service is to encourage matches based on compatible personalities, not physical characteristics. This means that you won't see photos of your matches and will be going on blind dates.  

While there is no cap on the number of matches you can receive, the service does not guarantee a specific number of dates. Once matches are introduced through email, the responsibility of contacting someone and organizing a date rests on your shoulders. 

Further Reading

Friend of a Friend review

Better Way to Meet (by Lamont White)

Better Way To Meet gay matchmaker  homepage

Lamont Scales White has a history of providing therapeutic services to gay men and couples, stemming from his background in psychology and community counseling. His inherent desire to assist others, especially those within the LGBTQ+ community, influenced significant parts of his career.

In 2014, White made the decision to offer a personalized approach to matchmaking focusing on gay men, leading to the establishment of 'Better Way to Meet.'

White's influence extends beyond his matchmaking service. Fans of Bravo's reality series 'Love Match Atlanta' may recognize him from the second season, where the show offers unique insights into the personal and professional lives of five professional matchmakers.


Better Way to Meet works with gay and bisexual men. While the business is headquartered in Atlanta, its client base spans the United States. 


Basic packages, which are only available in certain US cities, start out at around $1,500 and offer 1 to 2 potential matches. VIP memberships are available for clients across the US and begin at around $4,500. This level of membership typically includes 3 to 4 potential matches. 

For additional services such as couples counseling and mock dating, you can expect to pay around $125 per session.  

What To Expect 

The Better Way to Meet process begins by filling out a matchmaking application, followed by an initial consultation that carries a non-refundable fee of $100. 

Clients have the option to select from either a basic or a VIP membership. Both tiers include dating coaching sessions and assistance with planning your first date. You'll be meeting matches that are pulled from White's database. After the date, both parties are encouraged to provide feedback. 

Men can also sign up to be part of the singles database, which also requires paying the interview fee. This level of membership is passive - you will only be contacted if your profile aligns with the preferences of a paying client.

Further Reading

Better Way To Meet review

Denver’s Cupid (by R. Tony Smith)

Gay matchmaker Denver's Cupid

R. Tony Smith's foray into matchmaking began with his campaign for the Denver City Council, as he sought to enhance connections between community members and local government.

During his time working with the community, Smith noticed that singles often turned to matchmakers who were from similar backgrounds or lifestyles. However, he discovered a lack of services catering specifically to LGBTQ+ matchmaking in Denver.

Recognizing this gap, Smith launched his own matchmaking and coaching business, Denver's Cupid, in 2020 to cater to the LGBTQ community within the city.


Smith has established himself as "Colorado's Gay Matchmaker," only offering services to LGBTQ+ singles looking for a partner. 


Like many matchmaking services, Denver's Cupid doesn't provide specific pricing details on its website. However, online resources indicate that their packages start around $2,500 for a 6-month contract. 

What To Expect 

Smith recommends potential clients start by submitting a basic profile for Denver's Cupid database via their website. You'll then be considered a potential "catch" for paying clients.

Next, you'll participate in a no-cost consultation with Smith. He’ll go over the profile you submitted, and if he deems you a good fit, you'll sign a contract and the matchmaking process begins.

You’ll be matched with singles from within Denver's Cupid database, or sourced from Smith's matchmaking network. The extent of this search can reach locally, nationally, or even internationally, depending on the specifics of your contract.

Contracts typically span 6 months. Throughout this timeframe, Smith and his team will present matches and arrange the dates. Following each date, there's an opportunity for both parties to provide feedback.

Denver's Cupid also hosts a variety of events and activities to connect with other LGBTQ+ singles. These include social events, workshops, and virtual speed dating activities.

Further Reading

Denver’s Cupid review

Bespoke Matchmaking (by Carol Sugar-Burke)

Bespoke Matchmaking website homepage

Carol Sugar-Burke, the executive matchmaker at Bespoke Matchmaking, completed her studies in business and psychology at the University of Toronto. After working at a dating agency catering to the LGBTQ+ community, she established Bespoke Matchmaking in 2019. 

Based in Toronto, Bespoke also has a presence in several major cities across the US, including New York, Los Angeles, and San Francisco.


Bespoke Matchmaking provides matchmaking exclusively for gay and lesbian singles.


Specific pricing isn’t mentioned on the Bespoke Matchmaking website, but online service reviews suggest pricing starts around $5,000.   

What To Expect 

Prospective clients start with an online inquiry, followed by a 1-2 hour consultation with an executive matchmaker. During this session, you'll share information about yourself, your lifestyle, and your relationship goals.

If you decide to proceed, a personal matchmaker from Bespoke will be assigned to assist you throughout the process. After selecting a matchmaking package, you'll undergo personality evaluations and coaching sessions before going on any dates.

Suggested matches are sourced from either Bespoke's database or via Sugar-Burke’s network. Following each introduction, you're encouraged to provide feedback about your date to help the matchmaker refine the process if necessary.

Further Reading

Bespoke Matchmaking reviews

VIDA Select (by Scott Valdez)

VIDA Select matchmaking homepage

Established in 2009 by Scott Valdez, VIDA takes a modern approach to matchmaking that leverages the largest source of LGBTQ+ singles there is. 


Professional singles generally ranging in age from their 20s to 60s+ who are looking for an effective and efficient way to meet their ideal partner. 


VIDA Select’s packages start at just $1195 per month for Basic services. Premium options start at only $1795 per month and Elite packages begin at only $2595 per month. 

Package price highly aligns with the number of hours your dedicated matchmaker will spend on your search each month, considering factors such as your match criteria, geographic scope, etc. 

What To Expect 

The process starts with a quick online screening, followed by a complimentary consultation. During the call, you’ll learn exactly how the service will work for you and choose the package that best fits your search.

As a client, you can look forward to dates with relationship-worthy matches who check all your boxes. You’re in control of who you meet, as you’ll have the opportunity to approve every potential match based on a full profile and photos. No blind dates!

VIDA also offers an array of additional services designed to complement the matchmaking process, including dating/relationship coaching and personal styling. 

On average, clients meet someone special within just 3 months of beginning their service. Why not see if VIDA is right for you, too?

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Why Choose VIDA Select?

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Since 2009, thousands of clients have discovered true love thanks to VIDA Select’s fresh, modern approach to matchmaking – which has finally thrown blind dates and long-term contracts out the window. This isn't your grandmother’s matchmaking!

Instead of working with a single matchmaker using a small rolodex of potential partners, VIDA Select’s matchmaking team taps into the world’s largest database of available singles. We’ll quickly identify the matches who check all of your boxes so you can finally experience true chemistry. Are you ready to become our next success story? Schedule your complimentary consultation now by clicking the button below!

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